Last night I had a hookup for the first time. I told the guy I wanted him to use a condom, which offended him because he was like, “Why do I need to use one if you already have an IUD? Do you think I’m some STD-ridden guy?” I told him I just don’t know him that well. Either way it was fine in the end, he put it on and it was a fine night. Now I’m thinking, was I being a pushover?

  • toebert@piefed.social
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    7 days ago

    The fact that he didn’t do it by himself tells you he did not wear it with any previous partners who didn’t make him. So yes, that puts his likelihood of STD rather high.

    You were 100% right to make him wear one.

  • Bizzle@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    Anyone who says “we don’t need to use a condom” is someone who you should 100% use a condom with

  • inb4_FoundTheVegan@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    “Do you think I’m some STD-ridden guy”

    Jesus what an ignorant thing to say. Having an STD doesn’t make you a bad person or anything, it’s not a reflection on him if he did have an STD, it’s just a medical situation that requires certain precautions. So if your hooking up, then you inherently younever know so you HAVE to be safe.

    Glad it wasn’t a big problem and you had fun, but what an ass.

  • FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca
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    4 days ago

    No method of birth control is 100% effective (except abstinence) so it’s a good idea to use multiple methods simultaneously

  • Lor@mander.xyz
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    7 days ago

    I probably would have left, a comment like that would have killed the mood. He does know he could have an STD and not even know he has one (or two)… right? He is the type that is just living on a wing and a prayer. No thanks!

  • HubertManne@piefed.social
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    7 days ago

    What confuses me is why does he know about it but you said hookup so maybe you have known him awhile. My wife and I had doctors appointment were we both got std tests to show we were good on that front but we still used condoms because of the whole pregnancy thing but she did not have an iud. It would worry me if I was you that he wanted to do it without knowing if you had stds.

  • Frozentea725@feddit.uk
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    8 days ago

    Yeah always wear protection if you don’t know the person. If someone is not willing to that’s a serious red flag. Your body, your choice

  • azimir@lemmy.ml
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    8 days ago

    STD’s aren’t diagnosed (mostly) just by looking at people. That’s exactly why they’re so tough to eradicate.

    Wear protection and protect yourself. You did just fine here. If he is unwilling to be up to your safety needs, then he’s not worth keeping around.

  • NABDad@lemmy.world
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    8 days ago

    Personally, as a guy, I think him just questioning it is enough for you to have rejected him.

    The only appropriate response to being told to use a condom is, “Of course I’m going to use a condom.”