cw: suggestive

it probably doesn’t really matter, but i was added to a group chat with someone who was harassing me and they were talking to another girl in the gc like this. do friends really talk like this nowadays or are they likely doing it/dating or something? still gross, and especially on a gc.

like, i’ve seen friends flirt but they don’t act like that.

  • Azzu@lemm.ee
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    2 days ago

    I don’t know the app, but if they’re literally harassing you, this might also just be someone with two accounts talking with themselves.

    If they’re different people… “Friends” is just a label. It means “people being friendly with each other, helping each other out in a mutually beneficial relationship, not sexually involved”. The “not sexually involved” part is usually implied because if they were sexually involved, you’d call them something else, “partners” or “fuck buddy” or similar. But if someone is sexually open, not doing the standard “partnership/relationship” thing often or at all, then they might just drop the additional description of “friend” to have the property “not sexually involved”. It is literally called “friend with benefits” often. So yes, “friends”, however someone defines that label, may include talking like this.

    What you’re really asking is “in usual society, do friends usually talk like this?”, to which the answer is no. But you’re also implying that friends talking like this, or someone having a slightly different definition of “friend”, is somehow a bad thing (“gross”). Which it is not, in a consensual relationship, anything goes. The bad thing is the “harassing you” part. There is no need for you to socially shame their sexual behavior by calling it publicly “gross”, the “harassing you” part is already shameful enough. I would focus on your boundaries and enforcing them, you are fully in your right to do that, and not focus on their behavior with other people.

    • FuglyDuck@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Usually friends-with-benefits types don’t necessarily involve involuntary 3rd parties in their role play, even if they’re open with their friend groups about their shenanigans.

      there’s a lot of ‘might be’ here, but none of it is particularly ‘normal’ behavior. I’m just gonna assume they’re weird trolls (or just one weird troll.)

      • Azzu@lemm.ee
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        2 days ago

        I mean, they already said they’re being harassed.

        In general and another situation, I can fully see how someone might add someone to group chat in a way of “hey guys I found another one to add to our chat, their kink is to act all indignant about noticing us sexting, have fun”.

        I already said my most likely scenario is one person playing two sides.