• Gabe Bell@lemmy.worldOP
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    3 months ago

    This will sound weird when I start, but I promise if you read the whole thing it will make sense.

    A while back (10, 12 years) I had major heart surgery. And so for a few weeks after I had problems doing some things, like walking for more than ten, fifteen minutes at a time, or sitting up right for more than five minutes.

    But the doctors said I needed “exercise” (bastards) so my beloved and I would go out to the shops, and she’d made me walk (because she loved me) and we’d take a wheelchair with us.

    Aside from the whole “walking” thing it was kind of fun, because imagine two people walking down the high street, pushing an empty wheelchair. One of them carrying a towel (and hugging it tightly) and the other walking slowly for no apparent reason. The number of strange and confused looks we got was really hilarious at times. Especially after I got tired and had to sit in the chair so she could push me for a while (which happened a lot, because of - you know - the surgery and the tired) and we saw someone who had seen us a few minutes earlier when I was up and walking about as if I was fine.

    Needless to say I seldom, if ever, gave up my seat on the bus, train, bench or anywhere else if anyone asked. Even if the person asking was 101 years old. I did explain why, and no one argued with me, but sometimes I got some dirty looks for that as well. Because I looked young and fit with no physical injuries.

    It wasn’t forever, and I never claimed to be disabled, and after eight or nine weeks I could bound about like a gazelle on heat. But those first few weeks? We got a lot of strange looks. And I know I said it was hilarious, but only because if I had decided to take offence then I would have whacked the wheelchair into so many people I probably would have been arrested :)

    (The towel, if you were wondering, was for my chest. Having your chest cracked open and put back together hurts a lot, but then if you sneeze or cough oh my sweet fucking god it hurts so much more. Putting a towel against it mitigates it some but still – fucking ow!!)

    • Setarkus.LW@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      if I had decided to take offence then I would have whacked the wheelchair into so many people I probably would have been arrested :)

      Maybe cardiac arrest before the police could arrest you :D

      (No idea if that’s how it works)

    • 0laura@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      The towel thing is very relatable, they gave me one after I got my first pacemaker. I was coughing a lot after the surgery and it was horrible, every time I coughed it hurt so much. I’m lucky that I’ve never been asked to give up my seat in a train, because I’m not sure if I’d have the confidence to say no.

      • Gabe Bell@lemmy.worldOP
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        1 month ago

        Having had this condition since I was born, confidence isn’t a problem at this point. If I think I need to stay seated, I just look them in the eye and say “no”.

        The only time I am willing to not do this (willing not do this? You get the idea) is if I genuinely believe the person asking is in more need than me at the given time, because – you know – the greater good :)

        • 0laura@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          same here, kinda. I was born with it but noone knew about it until the first incident when I was 11, and only really started affecting my day to day life a while after that, but I don’t really remember a time before that

    • [email protected]@sh.itjust.works
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      1 month ago

      Having cracked a rib while also having bronchitis, I empathize. I was carrying a pillow around for a similar purpose.
      So many confused like from everyone.

      Can’t imagine how much worse the post-surgery must hurt.