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Flashlight - to find my shotgun in the dark.
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Shotgun - Im going to cobain me out of this shit
2 picks gang!
Machete & motorbike.
Don’t forget the video camera to film it, then you can pick one item of your choice to be your loot drop for finding the set piece you just made in a left4dead level.
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Katana - because katana
First aid kit - for accidental cuts from katana
Flashlight - to see how much I’m bleeding
Two-man tent - place to swing katana in a way that will end up cutting me
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Why is a bike not on this list? Fuck a vehicle that needs gas, give me some pedal powe.
Never understood that about the walking dead. Gasoline stops being vital after 3-6 months, so years into the apocalypse and everyone’s driving cars, and Daryl has that sweet frankenbike. What are those things running on?
Gas is no longer in prime condition after 3-6 months, but is still combustible for at least a year or two. Old gas will damage your engine over time though. Most of the degradation is due to oxidization, so if the gas were in sealed cans, maybe it could last longer.
But yeah, 5+ years in and most gas is unlikely to work in an engine. You’d have to be making some kind of bio-ethanol at that point.
plot twist, the jeep is electric and there is a spinner-bike in the back you can use to charge it with. Only four short days of pedaling will get you 100 miles!
Zombie outbreak and owning a jeep? Now you got two problems!
And both problems are connected to the jeep?
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Phew. For a second I was concerned for the dog. The internet is a dark place
Yeah, I was wondering why there was no peanut butter in the mix 🤣.
ಠ_ಠ
It’s…your dog!
You could instead have a solar panel, light laptop with lots of nudes, and a printer. Source out the ink and paper from office buildings and trade nudes for stuff.
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Solar panel’s not on there.
NO PORN FOR YOU. OFF TO HORNY JAIL WITH YOU.
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Modern jeeps require regular part swaps every few weeks
I’d swap the flashlight for the body armour - easier to find a flashlight out and about.
I’d argue you might need a flashlight to find a flashlight but most homes will at least have a small version that will suffice
I was thinking about the german shephard… regardless if it’s trained or not, it’s a liability, it might become a zombie too.
And I chose the AK-47 because I thought it came with at least 1 round of ammo 🤷.
I like the idea of everything is best-case. So a trained pup, a loaded gun with couple of boxes of spare ammo, a new jeep with a full tank, etc.
LOL, imagine thinking a motorcycle or jeep would do you any damn good (especially after the gas you can siphon from abandoned cars has gone bad), when what you really need is a bicycle. Bikepackers and touring cyclists will be the kings of the apocalypse.
The Jeep will break down before running out of gas anyways
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The earlier in the apocalypse, the more panicking humans running around, so you’re absolutely correct there. Unfortunately, depending on where you live and how early you realize what’s happening, the roads might be utterly jammed with no hope of getting away from population centers. The bike would be less of a tank, but you’ll almost certainly make it farther - but is that any good? Unless you’re confident in your ability to go full bear grylls, it might be best to just hunker down and make as little noise as possible for that initial pandemonium.
I’d probably stay clear of basically anywhere that you’d wanna go in an apocalypse for those 72 hours, because everybody else has the same idea. Find somewhere with a second story, block or preferably destroy the staircase, and stay as quiet as possible while scavenging what you can.
There are diesel Kawasaki KLR motorcycles that will run on literally anything, not that they’re very fast but they would at least preserve your stamina for when you need it.
They’re also extremely robust and simple to repair.
I’d still say the Jeep is better shelter than the tent, though not as portable.
Assuming best case scenario (a new jeep is shat into my driveway with a full tank of gas) I think the jeep is a MASSIVE boon. It increases movement ability and hauling capacity, and can be used to clear many obstacles you’d otherwise have to go around. Is its life finite? Yes, but it’ll give you that leg up at the start of the situation that may very well set you up for success long term.
and can be used to clear many obstacles you’d otherwise have to go around.
I’m having trouble imagining any obstacle a Jeep could clear that a mountain bike couldn’t, but no trouble at all imagining the opposite.
Anything blocking paths. Can’t move broken vehicles, downed trees, etc with a bike. Sure a bike can go around, but with a jeep, I can go through, and have space to haul a bike back.
Water purifier - clean water is essential
Fire Axe - for fire wood collection as well as wood based structures for shelter and defense. Also it is a decent weapon that takes relatively little skill to effectively wield.
German Shepard - loyal and lethal companionship, living thinking alarm bell, will instinctively assist in protection/attacking, could be trained to track game. Will gladly accept food scraps, the bones and flesh of my enemies, and pets as payment for services rendered.
Body armor - reduces risk of infection through scratches to body as well as mild protection against various weapons. Also an added insulative thermal layer for the cold. Body plate can be replaced with old thinkpads as needed
I’d argue that NVGs would be better than body armor, assuming that the batteries last. Being able to see at times when humans and zombies cant is extremely valuable. Nighttime is tough without working lights.
Modern nvgs aren’t battery powered the way we think any more. They last a while
The problem with NVG and all the battery operated stuff is that once it runs out its useless unless you have a means to replace them through looting replacable batteries or recharging lithiums with an offgrid power system and the electrical knowledge to make sure you dont cook them in case of a jerry rigged system. It might be really useful for a good couple hours of operation but after that it becomes dead weight you spend calories or fuel hauling around with the faint hope of maybe being able to recharge it again sometime in the future
Realistically, everything is finite use if you can’t maintain it. The more relevant approach is what kind of utility do you get during that thing’s lifetime, and does it outweigh the other options. NVGs, while not my choice, do provide a lot of utility, and last a fairly long time. They also don’t run the risk of full-on breaking, just running dry, meaning that they can be kept around if you think you may find batteries.
4 German shepards for having sex with (i am a white woman from the American south)
I was going to say 4 German shepherds for more innocent reasons, but now my answer would be overshadowed be yours
At least someone gets fucked before getting fucked
4 video cameras. I shall trade for all the above with the only source of amateur pornography.
I’ll pick the dog and we can team up
It’ll be the internet 2.0
Almost nobody picks the katana. Even the people who pick it mocking the sword!
I can’t really blame them because they didn’t give you the option to pick the complete set for the katana to shine. If you use it with fedora you can teleport behind the zombies and kill them!
Nobody knows that the katana has this hidden skill bonus if you use it with fedora because this hidden mechanic only passed to the few chosen people in the secret society hidden under the house that people like to call “the basement”
I considered the katana since they’re great for cutting exposed areas but honestly I’d rather just sharpen a long stick
If we’re going on “brain damage to kill” rules you’re going to need to clean sweep their head off or find a way to the brain. As cool as it is, that’s a big ask for something designed for one swift body shot. I’d look for the spear since it’s the most effective peasant weapon and be real, we’re all about peasant skilled.
Man, the katana would be a great pick if there wasn’t two better melee options that’ll outlast the katana and offer more utility.
Is the German Shepard a rescue? Anyway that and the camcorder. I’m making cute dog videos
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Four chain saws
come at me bro
Two for the hands and one for the head?
One for both heads
Gas will expire eventually and you could just hotwire one of the many abandoned cars anyways, if the roads aren’t blocked by said cars. Bullets will run out unless you find a gun shop, in which case you get guns anyways. Water purifying is easy enough to do without a machine.
My picks would be German Shepherd, Axe, First Aid, and Radio.
There’s a reason we domesticated dogs, they are useful in so many different ways like hunting, defense, and security (and companionship). Especially German Shepherds, you can see the damage they do when used by police.
Axes are survivalist 101 and some are practically multi tools despite being simple.
First Aid because infections, zombie or not, are the real killers throughout history.
The radio’s more of a gamble, but it’s your best chance to find a new settlement, monke strong together and all that. Also you can maybe stay informed on what’s happening in other parts of the country. (And it lets me flex my Amateur Radio License).
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I feel the tracking and hunting capabilities of a dog will more than make up for what they need to eat.
I think I’d take the night vision goggles over the radio. You’re much more likely to find a radio. Situational awareness at night will be a huge survival factor.
Water purifier: you need water to live. Otherwise you’ll die in 3 days.
Jeep: While not the most reliable, they can go off-road and can also be a source of shelter in lieu of a house or tent.
AK: Extremely reliable and easy to service. 7.62 ammo can be harder to come by depending on where you live, but regardless, the AK is a solid weapon.
Fire Axe: Good for chopping down trees, cracking heads or breaking down doors. The practicality is what makes it the better option
I chose similarly but changed somethings for longevity.
I subbed out the jeep for body armor. The jeep will run out of gas eventually, who knows how long the apocalypse will last for. Body armor will be last near indefinitely. Also would swap out the ak for a machete. Ammo will probably be hoarded by others so will be a difficult find.
Fire axe is a great utility tool, once it becomes dull, it’ll be a good blunt weapon. Machete will not be as good but if you learn how to sharpen or find a whetstone, they’ll last you as long as you need.
Most body armor is good for 1 strike. Kevlar thread break, ceramic breaks, and you really don’t want to use dented armor, best case it’s a weak point, worst case is pushing in your chest cavity preventing you from breathing. Any body armor that is remotely mobile is effectively one time use. Now admitted (normally) used body armor can still provide some protection and can be better than nothing (except in situations where the damage impacts you, ie the plate metal being dented and pushing into your chest). And some can be repaired or replaced with the right materials and tools, but those are heavy, and take space
Going with all but the water purifier. Fresh water is too easy to come by where I live. We have pristine wild rivers here, and it rains a lot. I’d be living in the forest anyway if this happened.
So I’m going with AK, Jeep, body armor, and Axe.
I chose the same top 3. Torn on the 4th between fire ax, first aid, or flash light.