Mohkia

Both tech and horses here…uh oh. 😂 alas, to damned expensive for horses and did’t get back into tech after i moved to be withvmy husband., decided to randomly pick up horticulture as a career choice instead.

Thanks, I said my good Byes Saturday while she was still conscious enough to respond, she passed Sunday evening at home in her sleep. I didn’t want to stress her by taking her to the vet and she didn’t seem to be in distress so I let her pass naturally. She had a good long life, trying to just think about that and not get caught up in sadness.

As for classes, I’m taking an intro to horticulture class and an intro to psychology class. This is a trial semester and i’m kind of testing the waters. I have a bad past record with college and am stressing over this but I must defeat my inner demons. Trial by fire I guess. I start next week and am already feeling a bit overwhelmed as I was just reading the class prep notes and am sitting here wondering what did I get myself into? I am just ignoring that particular inner voice right now. I can do this!

I kind of just have issues keeping my attention on either honestly, unless I suddenly get absorbed in the topic which does happen and then I marathon read/listening. I just do what I can when I can. At least listening i can just rewind when I fade off and I can do other stuff while listening where as reading I need to be low enough energy to sit long enough. I do enjoy the tactile feeling of reading a real book and flipping through the pages when I manage it. I apparently have 3 different books going right now and it’s taking me forever to read them.

As for how I’m doing this week? I don’t know, nervous about the classes I’m starting in a few weeks, trying to get back to where I was at before the holidays, some mistakes where made but I am forgiving myself and moving on from it. My cat is not doing well (she is very old) and I might have to say goodbye soon, I’m having emotions that I haven’t sorted about the entirety of last year and trying to figure out where to go from here with the new year. All in all though I am okay and just taking it one day at a time.

This is so very sad and hurts my heart. And seeing as we are being serious here I will add that I was very close to being part of this statistic about a year ago. For so many of us it was not caught when we where kids and it is no surprise to me to see these kinds of numbers. And those are just a couple statistics, we also have more accidents, more unwanted/unplanned pregnancies, more chance of substance abuse, more other health issues do to poor choices and not looking after our needs, reduced life expectancy from these choices, the list goes on. I think it was Russell Barkley that talks of this.

I try really hard to make earlier in the day appointments now because of this. Of course once the appointment or whatever it is is done I still don’t do anything else with the day because you know what? All that waiting was exhausting and now I’m spent.

Ooph, I feel this, I almost just got in an argument with my husband again about money spent…I’m going to go hide my credit card from myself now.

It’s like Christmas all year round! I see nothing wrong with this! 😃

Thanks for sharing this. I didn’t have a name for this feeling until I was diagnosed with ADHD and started learning more about it and all that comes along with it. Though I would not wish this on anyone else it is good to know sometimes that we are not the only ones going through these struggles.

Yep! Me too. 3 is the lucky number here! Though I do suspect living with undiagnosed ADHD my whole life led up to the other two. I’m just a bundle of fun over here.

I feel called out by this statement. At least something is getting done though.

If I’m not really into what I’m reading the words are just words and I dont really absorb what is being said, if I am interested in what I’m reading however its the opposite and I don’t even see words, just knowledge or if its a story I disappear into another world. It’s one or the other and I can’t force it. I think I must hit some kind of hyperfocus mode when I am able because usually when this happens it’s hard to pull myself out of what I’m reading. I need to figure out how to turn that mode on manually. 😆

Not in tech anymore but I definitely do this with my jobs. It really sucks because I could be doing so much more but I just can’t be bothered to care after the I got a new job and this is interesting phase. But at least I have these random bits of information that I can pretend to be smart with thst come up at the most inopportune times. 🤣 I feel you on the imposter syndrome.

At 22 you still have most of your life to live. Be glad you found out now and not at 44. Diagnosed this summer and it’s good to know, but at the same time all those years of flailing kind of make me sad. All I can do though is move on from here and I hope you can do the same.

Yep, never was able to understand what I should be studying for exams. Always was learning the wrong things and then would be like where did that question come from? Then id try to just make stuff up to answer.

Got to college and it was even worse. They threw stuff on there from lectures that was not in the text book and of course I wasn’t paying attention or wasn’t even there. 🙄

of course the classes I was fascinated with I didn’t have trouble because I could almost recite the material after fixating on it. Wish I could have done that for all my classes. Maybe I’d have a degree right now. would have been nice to know about ADHD back then. Oh well. Such is life.

I don’t do a lot of commenting but I just wanted to say thank you for putting your foot down on this. It is incredibly disheartening to keep hearing stuff like that. It discourages people from sharing and learning. It dismisses people’s lived experiences and troubles.

Personally I started to have suspicions about a year ago and it wasn’t due to these memes. It was due to real struggles I am having. I hit rock bottom and just got fed up with my crap amd was finally done running from my problems. I never self disgnosed but i atumbled upon an rlarticle o. Adhd when i was trying tonfogute out why inwas so much fail and it resonated so i started reading and then found these communities which I did relate too way to much. And now as of about a month ago I have a diagnosis. The memes did help encourage me to seek help but they where not the sole reason.

Anyways, if someone relates and it encourages them to seek help I see that as a win even if it turns out they don’t have adhd. And even though many people frown on it “self diagnosis” is a first step for many in seeking an official diagnosis. I really don’t understand this mentality of people dismissing ADHD or gatekeeping it. It’s not like people just want to have ADHD. People are here because they either have it, a loved one has it or they may have suspicions.

I just felt like I wanted to say something because this stuff has really been bothering me. Thabk you for trying to keep this a safe space for us all. Much respect.

I feel this in my soul. I have all these hobbies I want to do, and I keep finding more and I keep buying stuff for said hobbies but barely actually manage to do any of them. Same reason I have never been able to decide on a career…to many things I want to do. I genuinely want to do these things, I have officially overwhelmed myself I think. So instead I sit here and waste time on my phone.

Yes! Omg…people ask me what they think is a simple question about said hobby completely unaware of the absolute storm that is about to be unleashed upon them. For example, someone asks me a simple how do you keep this plant alive…well you now are going to learn where it is native too, what the climate is like, it’s life cycle and blooming characteristics, its evolution and taxonomy, pollinators and oh don’t forget about the diseases and pests it gets and oh! Let’s talk about soil chemistry…and mushrooms! Fungus are fascinating and network with plants…anyways, you get the idea. And suddenly they are trying to exit the conversation, and im like wait nooo, i have more. 😆

my friend has seen me do this to so many people and she just sits there with an amused look when she knows it’s about to happen. So glad someone gets entertainment out of it.

Pretty much what you said except I joined lemmy the day of the blackouts. I gave up most of the other social media sites years ago but reddit was hard for me to quit until the protest. Now I am here and have a few groups on discord. My social media time has gone way down, I’m just finding other things to waste my time on now.

Honestly this, if you are at drop sight death is immediate. Worst is on thebout edge where your body slowly melts from radiation exposure. Fun times.

I think there are a lot of computer illiterate people I most generations but there seems to be an overlap of late gen x/early millennial thst kind of had to learn how computers and the internet worked if they wanted to use them as tech wasn’t as easy to use. Plus anyone older than that who used computers where more often considered nerds.

These days more and more people don’t even have a computer and just do everything through their phones.