• li10@feddit.uk
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    1 year ago

    “Parents take you to a psychologist”

    Can’t relate to that bit, my mother refused to even take me to the opticians because she insisted there was nothing wrong with me.

    These days she thinks I’m making the ADHD stuff up, and occasionally asks me why I don’t just take off my glasses for a while…

    • Guilvareux@feddit.ukOP
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      1 year ago

      Sorry dude that sounds rough.

      I was thankfully provided transport, but I was also subjected to a long lecture on why I “don’t want to be on medication”.

      • li10@feddit.uk
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        1 year ago

        I can relate to that, they’re suddenly experts on a condition that they don’t understand and the medication to treat it.

    • schnex@reddthat.com
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      1 year ago

      Can I ask how well you now look after yourself as an adult? Cause I grew up similarly and have huge issues caring for myself, it’s like I can’t identify what is good for me

      • li10@feddit.uk
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        1 year ago

        It’s quite difficult, I was told a lot that I just need to get on with stuff and the response was “it’s not a problem” to any issues.

        I once had a bad infection on my leg and just ignored it until people at work said I needed to speak to someone. Eventually I ended up at the hospital, the doctor was quite surprised at how bad I’d let it get, and was even more shocked when I said I was going back to work after 😂

        She basically said that there’s no way I should be going back to work, and said I needed to take a few days off and take antibiotics. My mum said it wasn’t that bad…

        I also registered with a dentist for the first time in 10 years recently, and had a load of fillings done. My mum kept telling me I didn’t need them unless my teeth hurt (they did, but she ignored me saying that), and that the dentist was just trying to rip me off, despite them showing me pictures of the decay on some teeth.

        All I can really say is that it’s best to book appointments for any issues, and then gauge whether it’s something that you should have just been putting up with based on the doctor/professional’s advice. Then eventually you’ll get some kind of rational basis for what needs to be sorted and what you should be putting up with.

    • blueskiesoc@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      But why would my parents take me to a doctor when my mom does all the same stuff?

      “It’s normal.” …uh, no. Mom had undisagnosed ADHD.

  • BilboBargains@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Diagnosed at 47. It’s been a helluva ride. I’ve been addicted to more substances than you can shake a stick at. Car crashes. Destroyed relationships. Academic disasters. Depression. Criminal justice. Happy now though, trying not to look back but it wasn’t all bad. Every day I do a bit of work on rebuilding my self esteem.

  • MissJinx@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Everythinga checks out except the last about the parents. My mom said she was sorry and told me that schools and parents were not taught about those things and she didn’t knew better. She was really sad. Poor mom did her best

  • bullsaint@lemmy.sdf.org
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    1 year ago

    I got diagnosed at 35, and when I got out on Adderall, I got mad. I say there, no bees buzzing in my brain, focusing on one thing, thinking to myself, “THIS IS HOW NEUROTYPICAL PEOPLE FEEL ALL THE TIME?!”

  • dragonflyteaparty@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Just got my six year old diagnosed and we are learning how to help her develop strategies to deal with it. For now, we’re keeping meds on the back burner, but anyone have more recent experience with meds as a child? My husband wasn’t diagnosed until he was an adult and we don’t want to immediately start with meds or use his coping method of Adderall and copious amounts of caffeine.

    • Isaac95@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Out of curiosity is there a particular reason you’re avoiding meds for them other than the stigma associated with stimulants? It’s a first-line treatment for ADHD not a last resort.

      • dragonflyteaparty@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Mostly because she’s six. It’s not so much about the stigma, but that my husband and I both feel that medication simply covers up the issue rather than learning ways to work with how her brain works. We will absolutely get her meds if need be, but right now things like movement breaks at dinner seem to be really helping.

        • Guilvareux@feddit.ukOP
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          1 year ago

          Without intending to be pinickity, I would just like to say that, long-term studies of stimulant medication show growth in the areas of the brain ADHDers are typically underdeveloped.

          Making no comment on you decision, I just wanted to challenge that it merely covers up the issue. It may very well be that understanding herself and ADHD-educated parents are the only necessary tools (I wouldn’t know - sounds like she’s lucked out). But the medication does actually address (to some extent) aspects of the underlying problem enough to be neurologically measurable.

          • dragonflyteaparty@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Oh yes, it does address the underlying problem. Absolutely. We aren’t thinking of meds as a last resort, but simply after we all have some tools in our belt to help manage the symptoms. The underdevelopment is interesting. I’ll look into that, but it likely won’t affect our decision regarding medication.

            Thank you for your comments and replies. They are very well thought out.

            • Guilvareux@feddit.ukOP
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              1 year ago

              Thank you for your comments and replies. They are very well thought out.

              Thank you, kind stranger. I wish you and you family all the best.

      • iquanyin@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        that hit me too. people want to avoid what is the mostly likely thing to work. how stimulants affect adhd people: the enhance concentration, making it possible to learn and grow in a healthier way, to succeed. they don’t do the same thing that they do to someone without adhd. just like insulin for a type one diabetic.

      • Q67916tJ6Z0aWM@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Never been on anything except for ssri’s, over the counter stimulants and alcohol. But I recall one of my first girlfriends was ADHD and on Adderall. She would skip it because she said it made her feel like a zombie.

  • ballzovsteel@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Just started meds at 29. I can’t actually get my work done, I can see how little I could accomplish before. It’s crazy.

    • Guilvareux@feddit.ukOP
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      1 year ago

      Similar story, started at 24, bout a year ago. Only just managed to find the best dose.

      Oh how small the world seemed before.

        • ballzovsteel@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Like OP said, I am on Vyvanse as well and I found it to be much better than adderall. I feel a little more like myself.

        • Guilvareux@feddit.ukOP
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          1 year ago

          Vyvanse. Essentially adderall but slow release. I’ve heard it’s much smoother when it comes on.

          • chaos@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            It’s very similar but it’s not the exact same (not including the time release part). Vyvanse is 100% dextroamphetamine after time release; adderall is 3/4 dextro and 1/4 levoamphetamine. Different people feel that differently, for example with only dextro I feel much calmer/less prone to anxiety, but without the small amount of levo I have trouble motivating myself and can fall asleep easily. They also have 100% dextro in instant release format: dexedrine or zenzedi.

  • idk@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    It took a huge amount of time and self reflection to realize that I’m not lazy and I’m actually trying my best. It’s sad to think how misunderstood I was for so, so many years.

  • BrianTheFirst@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    I’m just now getting diagnosed, and I’m not super young. It has been starting to hit me, how much of my childhood is explained by this. This starter pack just drove in the point. It’s not all accurate, but the stuff that is accurate hits deep.

  • bignavy@programming.dev
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    1 year ago

    Yes.

    Although I was also of an age when I was diagnosed (40), where it not only threw my whole life up to that point into a different light….it also threw my parent’s lives up to that point into a different light. Because part of why I was sure I was ‘normal’ for 40 years was because my whole family did the exact same things….🤦🤷‍♂️

  • Kertain@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    This made me tear up. Working with my son through his adhd issues made me angry and sad I went through the same without any support.